Taking the trouble to get to know them
I began training for my new job as a camp counselor. I'll be working with 6th-9th graders, some of whom have physical and mental disabilities. As the counselors lounged on the comfy couches in our 70's styled homebase, the assistant director gave us the rundown on the kids with disabilities, ranging form cerebal palsy to ADHD to autism. Each kid with a disability had a litany of special needs that we had to know about. We shouldn't say "no" or "don't do that" to one kid. One cries and screams when she hears the "happy birthday" song. Two are inappropriate touchers. One needs a special cool-off rocking chair for his angry outburts and two of them need their diapers changed.
I wish we would have met the kids before hearing about all of their needs, because then they would be real people, not just problems on paper. Their disabilities are daunting. I felt like we were catering to their every whim and I felt myself feeling angry at their parents for...geez, I don't know. I'm mad at them for having kids who I won't feel instantly comfortable around, who I'll have to work harder for, and who won't necessarily be the typical easy camper. I'm scared of disability and I'm scared of interacting with people who have them.
I cut this out of the New York Times about a week ago. I wasn't sure why at the time, but now it makes sense to me. This letter is in response to "Autism's Parent Trap" by Cammie McGovern (Op-Ed, June 5)
"To the Editor:
...In the almost 20 years since my own autistic son was born, I have never seen a "recovered" child. And yet what might have been a personal tragedy-and is, for many parents- turned out to be a treasure.
In his sweet, elusive, bright, limited, funny, sometimes irritating and frankly tiresome character, I found a human being who is utterly without malice.
In his own odd way, Randy is the gentlest, most unexpected, original person I have ever known. He inspires almost everyone who takes the trouble to know him. Even if I could turn Randy into a "real boy" I would not...
Linda H. Davis
Harvard, Mass June 5, 2006"
I wish we would have met the kids before hearing about all of their needs, because then they would be real people, not just problems on paper. Their disabilities are daunting. I felt like we were catering to their every whim and I felt myself feeling angry at their parents for...geez, I don't know. I'm mad at them for having kids who I won't feel instantly comfortable around, who I'll have to work harder for, and who won't necessarily be the typical easy camper. I'm scared of disability and I'm scared of interacting with people who have them.
I cut this out of the New York Times about a week ago. I wasn't sure why at the time, but now it makes sense to me. This letter is in response to "Autism's Parent Trap" by Cammie McGovern (Op-Ed, June 5)
"To the Editor:
...In the almost 20 years since my own autistic son was born, I have never seen a "recovered" child. And yet what might have been a personal tragedy-and is, for many parents- turned out to be a treasure.
In his sweet, elusive, bright, limited, funny, sometimes irritating and frankly tiresome character, I found a human being who is utterly without malice.
In his own odd way, Randy is the gentlest, most unexpected, original person I have ever known. He inspires almost everyone who takes the trouble to know him. Even if I could turn Randy into a "real boy" I would not...
Linda H. Davis
Harvard, Mass June 5, 2006"
Labels: (dis)ability, ally, links
posted by wms at 8:36 PM
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